Visiting Sydney huh?

One thing that I've learned in my short time here is that folks pretty quickly pick out that I'm not exactly from these parts.  Either they think that (1) I'm just here for a visit or (2) are expecting me to leave pretty soon.  They give me that look like they're letting me in on the secret that there aren't that many Black people here.  DUH!  I've been able to discern this over the course of numerous interactions with the locals.  These interactions, while always friendly, tend to come with that undeniable hint of "you must be lost" in the questioner's voice.  Most conversations start with "Where are you from?"  I tell them 'Wahroonga' and just just act as if all the Black people in Oz are from there. (Wahroonga is a leafy suburb with tons of old money and houses with names like 'Culingral' - we rent there now and I've yet to see another Black person mowing their lawn or having a jog in the neighborhood.)  So as any good American would do, I try to take full advantage of the misperception that I'm just a guest in my newly adopted homeland. (see Mands - I told you I could say it) Below are few things I like to do it give myself a bit of a laugh...



(1) I use all kinds of Aussie lingo that I have no business saying and probably sounds like a record scratching when it comes off my tongue.  Words and phrases like "fair dinkum" (genuine), "Monday arvo" (Monday afternoon), "Pommie bastard" (Englishman) and "budgie smugglers" (dick stickers/eurokinis/skivvies...you get the picture).  It's great.  I get the best looks as people want to give me credit for at least trying to fit in.

(2) People automatically think that a Black man from the U.S. is the coolest man alive.  I get randoms asking me about the latest hip hop songs or trying to be "down" with hardcore handshakes.  Of course I let them roll with that train of thought while I'm thinkin "fool, I'm a father of 2 living in the 'burbs of Oz - hell no I haven't heard the latest track from (insert unknown hip hop artist here)"

(3) Most people here are really outdoorsy.  I mean fishing, boating, camping, the whole nine.  So, you know, I play along.  I put on my safari hat from S. Africa, pack the cooler with brews and throw on some boots (not my Tims b/c a brotha can't get them dirty). Then at night, when everyone has had a few drinks, I sit around and tell 'real' stories about how difficult it was growing up on the streets of Princeton and all the violence that goes un-reported at private schools like PDS.  I don't know if they believe it but I get a kick out of telling it.

So for you statesiders prepping to book your tickets to Oz, do me a few favors.  First, pick up a CD of the latest up and coming hip hop artist.  I figure 1 CD will solidify my 'hip' status for at least a year here.  Second, people keep stepping on my Tims here when I wear them (no respect!).  I'm gonna need another pair and I'm scared about what they'll cost me here.  And lastly, pack your camping gear cuz if I've got to do this shit then I'm dragging you along with me!!

Until next time.  Black2Oz out.